I LOVE SUGAR!!
Tumblr: Only a heartless person would scroll pa-
Me: *Scrolls past*

communistbakery:

zinzulation:

urls are getting so fucking weird now… like what the fuck is a “communist bakery”

no idea… sounds like a really dumb blog

mugglebornheadcanon:

626. The muggleborns used to organise giant games of Sardines until someone hid in the Room of Requirement and wasn’t found for two months.

roryflannelgan:

“oh no” my followers whisper in horror as i show signs of entering yet another fandom

So I was cleaning my brothers room

bewbin:

bewbin:

and i had found an old dream journal that he had when he was a junior

image

then i opened it

image

i dont know what i  expected

it should really be called a lie journal. i dont even have a brother

YESTERDAY MY SISTER WAS ON SKYPE ON THE KITCHEN BUT SHE DIDNT TOLD ME SO I WENT THERE MY HAIR A MESS, RIPPED SWEATPANTS AND A GIANT SHIRT AND I STUFFED MY MOUTH WITH CAKE AND JUST STOOD THERE IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA EATING AND HER CUTE FRIEND GOES 'HEY GAB'S SISTER' AND I SCREAMED AND GRABBED THE CAKE AND RAN

underbellamy:

OOOOOOHHH MYYYYY GODDDDDDDD I LAUGHED SO HARD I SNORTED IM LAUGHING MORE THAT YOU GRABBED THE CAKE THATS TEH MOST IMPORTANT PART I MEAN THE FACT THEY WERE WATCHING YOU JFC I WOULD OF KARATE CHOPPED THE SCREEN IN HALF HAHAHAH

When I was in elemntry school I was playing baseball and I had this habit of hucking the bat behind me when I was done before I was about to run (I got in trouble for it before I have no idea why I did it reflex maybe idk) but anyway I hit the ball and hucked it behind me and it hit a teacher and I got in huge trouble I felt so bad I almost cried

SEND ME A FUNNY STORY ANON/OR NOT THAT HAPPENED TO YOU THAT YOU DON’T MIND SHARING WITH ME AND I’LL SHARE ONE BACK <3

My class today
Me: So when you see the 4 year old boy pull the little girl's hair...
Students: He likes her!
Me: Now they are around 11 or 12 and he grabs her arm and wrestles her to the ground even though she calls him a jerk and yells at him to leave her alone.
Students: That is just how boys are.
Me: Now they are 18 and he grabs her arm and--
Students: Oh, that's not okay.
Me: Really? How would he know? How would she know? How would you know? You just told me that for the first 17 years of these children's lives that you thought it was cute, sweet, and natural for a boy to grab a girl and be rough with her.
Students: Oh.
Me: Oh, is right.

officialunitedstates:

my favorite part of any trip to mcdonalds is the sudden and unavoidable flashbacks to the time when I got stuck in the slide for 5.5 hours and the staff had to slide down mcnuggets so I could keep up my energy while they cut the slide in half with a hacksaw.  half-slide is still there, haunting me and the other kids who sudden fall through a hole halfway through their journey down

What it was going to be, we were trying to complicate the relationship between Cap and his S.H.I.E.L.D agent friends. If Hawkeye got a call from S.H.I.E.L.D saying Captain America is a fugitive, would he listen to that call or not listen to that call? That sequence actually was heartbreaking for us to cut it. I think it ultimately might have been a conflict with Renner’s schedule. But there was a great sequence where Hawkeye was chasing Cap through Washington D.C. there was an awesome sequence where they confronted each other in a ravine on the outskirts of D.C. and Hawkeye was shooting a series of arrows closing in on Cap, Cap closing in on him. And then Cap took him down and he realized for the first time that Hawkeye was trying to trick S.H.I.E.L.D, where he whispered something into Cap’s ear that Cap had a tracker on his suit and to punch Hawkeye to make it look real, because there was a Quinjet hovering above where they were watching the feedback back at S.H.I.E.L.D. So it was a cool sequence.
Details on the cut Hawkeye sequence from Captain America: The Winter Soldier. (via iputabirdonmyhead)

idonegaffedit:

i accidentally told my friend the sweetest pick up line ever. i started talking about solipsism (the belief that everything around you was created by your mind) and i went “If everything around me is all my imagination, then you’re the best thing I’ve come up with” she was speechless for a solid five minutes.

hooddoggy:

person: chris watch out! youre about to get your crocs wet!

me: I KNOW! its OK! crocs are made from a foam resin called croslite, which is made out of a polymer called ethylene-vinyl acetate! so theyre completely water proof!

Once when I was in nursery this boy came up behind me and shoved me down the "hill" (bear in mind that now I'm older if I stand next to it, it is knee height) and I rolled down this little lump of grass and ended up being run over by a tricycle and when I got up the girl who ran me over got up and punched me straight in the face. I had a black eye for ages

underbellamy:

sHE PUNCHED YOU????? WHAT AN ASS I WOULD OF BEEN LIKE IT WAS AN ACCIDENT BRAH HAHAHHA BUT WOWWW THATS WROTTEN LUCK AND WHAT A LITTLE SHIT THAT BOY WAS

I was like 13 when I first ice skated, I didn’t really know how and my balance sucked but I kind of learned from people around me so I slowly got the hang of it and I was fllyyyiinnngggg around the rink like yeaah I can flyyyyyyy and then my aunt was like “okay Brianna, going out to lunch!” from the sidelines so we had to go and I was like oh okay and then I realized I had no fucking idea how to stop and I was afraid to fall bc it would hurt so bad and I was a pansy so I finally mustered up the courage to instead of falling, but hitting the wall and I did that but got a really bad concussion.. hahahha

SEND ME A FUNNY STORY ANON/OR NOT THAT HAPPENED TO YOU THAT YOU DON’T MIND SHARING WITH ME AND I’LL SHARE ONE BACK <3

hiowl:

missmania244:

eatfithappiness:

epic-humor:

Animals Growing Up

Cuz who wouldn’t want this on their dash

The turtle one

If this doesn’t make ur day better u are wrong and you can go

nflstreet:

feeling your computer getting slower though the years is one of the most heartbreaking things ever

belgarina:

Waiting for the new #doctorwho at the cinema! #NinthDoctor

belgarina:

Waiting for the new #doctorwho at the cinema! #NinthDoctor